Thursday 13 October 2011

newspaper blackout poems on the train



(with apologies to newspaper blackout poetry man)






Thursday 6 October 2011

Train Pain

Pippa Maude Kendrick
sits on the train To London
once again,

“WHAT A MONUMENTAL PAIN!”
She shouts in the face of a man
Who has clearly styled himself as
An East Anglian David Blaine.

“There’s no need for that” he claims,
This twat, a false, more annoying than David Blaine,
version of the already twatty, false, annoying, David Blaine,
Annoying Pippa’s already annoyed face
On this already annoying train.

“Well actually I do believe there is!” Pippa exclaims
“WHAT A MONUMENTAL PAIN!
WHAT A MONUMENTAL PAIN!
WHAT! A! MONUMENTAL!PAIN!”,
She repeats,
louder than before,
Over and over,
And over again.

Outside the train it begins to rain
But no one notices as
Pippa’s vocal cords take the strain
And her mantra becomes louder,
More piercing,
Then louder and more piercing again.

“WHAT A MONUMENTAL PAIN!
WHAT A MONUMENTAL PAIN!
WHAT A MONUMENTAL PAIN!
WHAT A MONUMENTAL PAIN!”

When the train finally arrives at Liverpool Street Station
Everyone is dead
(Ear drums pierced, pools of claret, red)
Apart from Pippa Maude Kendrick
Who exits refreshed,
Smiling, glowing,
Ready for the busy day ahead.